me: babe grab my boob
bf: (grabs boob) (bone titty breaks)
me: see you in court asshole
You just can’t hide that shrek pride.
we could all learn a thing or two from shrek, and snoop.
Sylveon, and finally
I don’t know what I expected.
So my parents just found out about my fourteen year old brother smoking weed because they found this on his window ledge. So in the middle of a huge lecture my dad decides to open the Baggie and smell it to see how strong it is. He immediately starts crying with laughter. THIS NIGGA HAS BEEN BUYING AND SMOKING FUCKING OREGANO. FUCKIN ITALIAN HERBS. SON. I CAN’T. I CANNOT. I CAN’T DO THIS.
This isn’t funny. That’s the gateway drug to a full blown marinara addiction. It’s good this was caught before this kid started hanging out at Olive Garden and sucking on every breadstick he can find to score another hit.
IT GOT BETTER.
He was getting high though, let him be 😂
Sun and Moon. Within a Tree Stump.oh wow this is my favorite
i actually love this
* * ☽ * ☀ * ☾ * *
is it bad that i laughed
The only acceptable birthday cake
so when you blow out that candle you’ll be killing that charmander happy birthday u sick fuk
bisexual people aren’t more likely to cheat in relationships but we are more likely to cheat at cards, while lesbians are most likely to cheat at jenga, and genderqueer people often cheat at mario kart
how the fuck do you cheat at jenga
ask a lesbian
this is never not funny
Hello modelling agency?? yeah my selfie just got 34 notes I think I’m ready to go pro